60.100.188.72.cfl.res.rr.com - - [13/Feb/2010:16:51:01 -0800]
"GET /bikeracing/negacoach/
HTTP/1.1" 200 7430 "
http://www.google.com/search?q=cycling+coach+%2B+hard+ass
&ie=utf-8&oe=utf-8&aq=t&rls=org.mozilla:en-US:official&client=firefox-a" "Mozilla/5.0 (Windows; U; Windows NT 6.0; en-US; rv:1.9.1.7) Gecko/20091221 Firefox/3.5.7 (.NET CLR 3.5.30729)"
since 2006
Friday, February 26, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Saturday, February 20, 2010
DNF Green Monster Challenge
The little tit for tat in the comments section over on Willi's blog inspired me to setup my own little race results blogsite. We'll be following the blogs and keeping a scoreboard of just who has the most "early ride back to the car on race day and a long introspective drive home" days this season. This is going to be fun. Thanks for reading.
The DNF Green Monster Challenge
The DNF Green Monster Challenge
Patience and Confidence
Nega-Coach receives a lot of inquiries from athletes seeking training advice. Most of these athletes turn out to not only be fucking pussies, they're also dumbasses. It's the nature of the beasts. Yet we still try our best to help them. It's not easy though. A variety of obstacles stand in the way of improvement for these poor souls, but the most common ones are a lack of patience, and a lack of confidence with respect to the training they do. You would not believe how many riders believe they should feel stronger and stronger with every every training session they do. They send me data supporting their "improvement" from one week to the next, citing some miniscule increase in power as validation of their training methods. And so far, year after year, each and every one of them winds up on the same plateau.
I know I'm giving my audience way to much credit here, but since it's fairly nice outside and I want to get going on my own training, I'm taking a shortcut and posting a link to a podcast by Greg McMillan. In this episode, Greg explains why you may feel like shit when you've been training hard (I'm paraphrasing here). I know that all my genius athletes will profess that they already hold this knowledge, but since they're actions in real life don't back it up, I'm trying this.
You can't be patient with your training unless you're confident in it. As McMillan says, you don't want to be adjusting your training every time you have a race where you feel shitty. Yet that is what I see from nearly everyone. Now go fuck something up and blog about it. At least in three or four more weeks you'll be back to writing race reports. Thanks for reading.
I know I'm giving my audience way to much credit here, but since it's fairly nice outside and I want to get going on my own training, I'm taking a shortcut and posting a link to a podcast by Greg McMillan. In this episode, Greg explains why you may feel like shit when you've been training hard (I'm paraphrasing here). I know that all my genius athletes will profess that they already hold this knowledge, but since they're actions in real life don't back it up, I'm trying this.
You can't be patient with your training unless you're confident in it. As McMillan says, you don't want to be adjusting your training every time you have a race where you feel shitty. Yet that is what I see from nearly everyone. Now go fuck something up and blog about it. At least in three or four more weeks you'll be back to writing race reports. Thanks for reading.
Monday, February 15, 2010
Four More Years!
Really? Halfway through my ride today, I realized today was the 15th, meaning solobreak.blogspot.com turns four today. It also means that special 2nd anniversary nodcast is now two years late. Great artistic vision can't be hurried. But the blog rolls on, 729 posts including this one. It's become a lot more difficult, and I'm doubting there will be 729 more in the next four years, but at least I haven't let it die - yet. I was just a lad of 44 when I started this thing; it seemed like a good idea at that time. Anyway, I've got nothing today, except for a little memorial for all the blogs that have gone before this one. I almost titled this post All the blogs who died, died.
First and foremost, the great Zoo, and Cycling Obsessions. His was the first blog I ever read. Before that I don't think I even knew what a blog was. Zoo was a southern NH kid who somehow was unlucky enough to stumble upon our team of miscreants, looking for guidance in his quest to become a bike racer. How that worked out is another story, but he kept a blog or two about his misadventures in training. Zoo couldn't really decide if he wanted to be a bike racer or a triathlete. I don't think he could swim much further than the length of a backyard pool (neither can I) or run a 5k without stopping to rest, but the boy wonder quickly figured out that bike racers are 88% male, whereas triathletes are closer to 50/50 male/female... Our hero linked to a lot of triathlete blogs. Hell, there are a lot of triathlete blogs compared to bike racer blogs. So some of the first other blogs I found were those.
Zoo linked to the Iron Kahuna, Bolder in Boulder, and Iron Wil. His comments on the latter earned him the moniker "Milf-Hunter" back home at the club... The Kahuna was pretty funny too, and he was a real writer with a gig at the LA Times, but then he wrote a book and for some reason that was the end of his blog. But Bolder in Boulder was my favorite, and I really thought we had a chance of bringing him over to the dark side of bike racing. And just like that his blog was gone too, I suspect a victim of personal or professional consideration. I'm pretty sure he's still lurking though, unless somebody else wants to fess up to the hits from bluebird.ibm.com.
Then we had the fun boy three, 3bicoastalboys, led by MoveitFred, who occasionally still surfaces. These motherfuckers had one of the best blogs on the planet, two English profs, and a paramedic, go figure. I know these assholes still read this, so how about a comeback? Heywood, the tour of Cali is running right through Auburn this year, where's the party?
OK, who am I forgetting? Oh yeah, Josef B. Author of the all-time best blog comment ever, a simple "civil rights struggle, meet bike race" in response to one of Willi's rants on some imagined registration table injustice. Then there's the Automaton. He let his blog degenerate into a picture or two every three months, then abandoned it, I think. Maybe I just stopped checking. Dude, did you ever get a job other than being Jen's laundry boy? Then there's the kid from Maine, good rider, had race reports and occasionally some emo ramblings. Name of the blog escapes me now. Last but certainly not least, we have Feltslave and his numerous blogs. He's started and deleted so many that I've put him on probation, not linking to his current offering until I see him keep it going for six months or so.
I pity the fool!
Hate doing this, because I'm sure I (unintentionally) left some out. Here's where you come in. I'm sure you've seen the ad for the new A-Team movie (with Jessica Biel!). All the old TV shows get brought back as movies. What blogs do you want to see come back? Let's have some nominees. We all know that we need more, as you can't survive on just this crap for another four years. Thanks for reading, really!
First and foremost, the great Zoo, and Cycling Obsessions. His was the first blog I ever read. Before that I don't think I even knew what a blog was. Zoo was a southern NH kid who somehow was unlucky enough to stumble upon our team of miscreants, looking for guidance in his quest to become a bike racer. How that worked out is another story, but he kept a blog or two about his misadventures in training. Zoo couldn't really decide if he wanted to be a bike racer or a triathlete. I don't think he could swim much further than the length of a backyard pool (neither can I) or run a 5k without stopping to rest, but the boy wonder quickly figured out that bike racers are 88% male, whereas triathletes are closer to 50/50 male/female... Our hero linked to a lot of triathlete blogs. Hell, there are a lot of triathlete blogs compared to bike racer blogs. So some of the first other blogs I found were those.
Zoo linked to the Iron Kahuna, Bolder in Boulder, and Iron Wil. His comments on the latter earned him the moniker "Milf-Hunter" back home at the club... The Kahuna was pretty funny too, and he was a real writer with a gig at the LA Times, but then he wrote a book and for some reason that was the end of his blog. But Bolder in Boulder was my favorite, and I really thought we had a chance of bringing him over to the dark side of bike racing. And just like that his blog was gone too, I suspect a victim of personal or professional consideration. I'm pretty sure he's still lurking though, unless somebody else wants to fess up to the hits from bluebird.ibm.com.
Then we had the fun boy three, 3bicoastalboys, led by MoveitFred, who occasionally still surfaces. These motherfuckers had one of the best blogs on the planet, two English profs, and a paramedic, go figure. I know these assholes still read this, so how about a comeback? Heywood, the tour of Cali is running right through Auburn this year, where's the party?
OK, who am I forgetting? Oh yeah, Josef B. Author of the all-time best blog comment ever, a simple "civil rights struggle, meet bike race" in response to one of Willi's rants on some imagined registration table injustice. Then there's the Automaton. He let his blog degenerate into a picture or two every three months, then abandoned it, I think. Maybe I just stopped checking. Dude, did you ever get a job other than being Jen's laundry boy? Then there's the kid from Maine, good rider, had race reports and occasionally some emo ramblings. Name of the blog escapes me now. Last but certainly not least, we have Feltslave and his numerous blogs. He's started and deleted so many that I've put him on probation, not linking to his current offering until I see him keep it going for six months or so.
I pity the fool!
Hate doing this, because I'm sure I (unintentionally) left some out. Here's where you come in. I'm sure you've seen the ad for the new A-Team movie (with Jessica Biel!). All the old TV shows get brought back as movies. What blogs do you want to see come back? Let's have some nominees. We all know that we need more, as you can't survive on just this crap for another four years. Thanks for reading, really!
Sunday, February 14, 2010
Brockton Baby!
But sadly, no pictures. I really wanted a shot of the Paddy Kelly 5 mile road race headquarters, Harry's Pub at Westgate Lanes. But my camera batteries were dead. Anyway, this is a race report, my fourth Paddy Kelly in the last five years. Last season my foot problem axed the racing and I missed this one. This year, my mysterious sore hip threatened to do the same, but I am determined to do some racing over the winter because I feel like I'm too old to not put in race intensity for an entire winter without permanent loss of my dwindling top end. To that end I've assembled a completely new ensemble of medical professionals, and we're trying to figure out what is wrong and how to fix it. In the meantime, I'm fortunate to have as my team captain an expert on racing while injured, the indomitable Duano, who's advised me that the best approach is to simply not train. Save yourself for race day. And that's pretty much what I've been doing...
Well not completely. In between massage, chiropractor, and doctor's appointments, I've been running short and easy every four days or so. On top of that, I'm killing it in the solobreak February trainer challenge, having not missed a day yet, even coming back and riding the trainer on the (rare) days that I ride outside. But after a thirty hour January (that is a lot for me), February is rest month, and I'm planning on pushing my road season back a month or so from previous years. So my hip wasn't too sore on Saturday, and I decided to do the race. I had no idea what to expect.
The course is in Field's Park, with the start right where the cross race is. The route goes around the entire park, which I know by heart from thousands of bong hit and Haffenreffer-fueled circuits in old Ramblers, Falcons, and Oldsmobiles back in the days when I should have been attending high school. Around 200 club runners lined up for the start. My plan was to take it out slow, try to do the first mile in 6:30, and then take off a few seconds each mile after that. I lined up second row behind a few known suspects in the masters field, and got a very clean start. Habitually running too close to the front, I sat down and did the math before the race. Figuring the leaders would run the first mile in 5:20, and that that's about five meters/second, I'd want to be over 300 meters back by the marker. That's a long way. And when we were almost halfway there, they were still close enough to hit with a well thrown snowball...
Despite feeling surprisingly good, I backed off anyway, and an obvious master from the Framingham club blew by me. The first mile ends just after the only genuine hill on the course, Tower Hill. Despite slowing down, and taking it "easy" on the hill, I got there in 5:58. I just knew this was bad, so I slowed down a lot more, and even still I was hurting a bit during mile two. I think all of it is false flat uphill, but the second split was a 6:17. Mile three starts downhill and I immediately felt great, even though my heart rate was crazy high. Some of the others near me started floundering, and I was keeping it together for a 6:14 split.
Mile four is pretty flat, but there's a short downhill right after it. I ran four in 6:06, with my heart rate in the high 160's, a place where these days I normally blow. The downhill seemed really short. The last mile in this race always feels ridiculously long, and since most of the competitors are seasoned runners who, unlike me, know how to pace, I've traditionally lost a lot of spots here in my previous attempts. This year we were more spread out and I just sucked it up. I thought I was going faster but it took 6:07 and my official finish was 30:38, fifteenth overall and third in the 40-49. This was my second fastest time on this course, a minute slower than my 29:35 pr in 2008, but faster than the two prior years. My hip wasn't really sore during the race but it tightened up a lot afterward. But I got in the race intensity that I wanted, with an average HR of 163 and a max of 173, matching the high number I saw only once during cross season.
If my hip doesn't bounce back and feel great in a few days, then I might bag out on running races for the rest of the spring. That's not my first choice though. We're trying a bunch of stuff to try to improve my running mechanics and hopefully eliminate the root cause of what feels like simple overuse inflammation, but whether or not that will work in the absence of extended rest, well, who knows? The Foxboro 10 miler is next week and I'd really like to be there, even though running as well as I did in 2008 (probably my best running race ever, any distance) just can't happen. Well there's always bike racing... Thanks for reading.
Well not completely. In between massage, chiropractor, and doctor's appointments, I've been running short and easy every four days or so. On top of that, I'm killing it in the solobreak February trainer challenge, having not missed a day yet, even coming back and riding the trainer on the (rare) days that I ride outside. But after a thirty hour January (that is a lot for me), February is rest month, and I'm planning on pushing my road season back a month or so from previous years. So my hip wasn't too sore on Saturday, and I decided to do the race. I had no idea what to expect.
The course is in Field's Park, with the start right where the cross race is. The route goes around the entire park, which I know by heart from thousands of bong hit and Haffenreffer-fueled circuits in old Ramblers, Falcons, and Oldsmobiles back in the days when I should have been attending high school. Around 200 club runners lined up for the start. My plan was to take it out slow, try to do the first mile in 6:30, and then take off a few seconds each mile after that. I lined up second row behind a few known suspects in the masters field, and got a very clean start. Habitually running too close to the front, I sat down and did the math before the race. Figuring the leaders would run the first mile in 5:20, and that that's about five meters/second, I'd want to be over 300 meters back by the marker. That's a long way. And when we were almost halfway there, they were still close enough to hit with a well thrown snowball...
Despite feeling surprisingly good, I backed off anyway, and an obvious master from the Framingham club blew by me. The first mile ends just after the only genuine hill on the course, Tower Hill. Despite slowing down, and taking it "easy" on the hill, I got there in 5:58. I just knew this was bad, so I slowed down a lot more, and even still I was hurting a bit during mile two. I think all of it is false flat uphill, but the second split was a 6:17. Mile three starts downhill and I immediately felt great, even though my heart rate was crazy high. Some of the others near me started floundering, and I was keeping it together for a 6:14 split.
Mile four is pretty flat, but there's a short downhill right after it. I ran four in 6:06, with my heart rate in the high 160's, a place where these days I normally blow. The downhill seemed really short. The last mile in this race always feels ridiculously long, and since most of the competitors are seasoned runners who, unlike me, know how to pace, I've traditionally lost a lot of spots here in my previous attempts. This year we were more spread out and I just sucked it up. I thought I was going faster but it took 6:07 and my official finish was 30:38, fifteenth overall and third in the 40-49. This was my second fastest time on this course, a minute slower than my 29:35 pr in 2008, but faster than the two prior years. My hip wasn't really sore during the race but it tightened up a lot afterward. But I got in the race intensity that I wanted, with an average HR of 163 and a max of 173, matching the high number I saw only once during cross season.
If my hip doesn't bounce back and feel great in a few days, then I might bag out on running races for the rest of the spring. That's not my first choice though. We're trying a bunch of stuff to try to improve my running mechanics and hopefully eliminate the root cause of what feels like simple overuse inflammation, but whether or not that will work in the absence of extended rest, well, who knows? The Foxboro 10 miler is next week and I'd really like to be there, even though running as well as I did in 2008 (probably my best running race ever, any distance) just can't happen. Well there's always bike racing... Thanks for reading.
Wednesday, February 10, 2010
Nega-Coach's Hidden Insight
This picture has nothing to do with this post. It's here because I like it, and it's my fucking blog.
The blog has it's anniversary next Monday, but Nega-coach went live four years ago today. I've learned a little bit during these four years. My teammates no longer soft pedal to keep from embarrassing me. The fear is gone. And I don't even Twitter. Perhaps all this learning has left me too easy on them. After all, I've made an honest effort to avoid hurting people's delicate feelings. Kind and gentle. The blogging hasn't gotten much easier either. I'm struggling to keep this thing going. The challenge is keeping it fresh without losing the edge. Which reminds me of some advice I dished out to one of my clients (motherfucking deadbeats) about time-trialing. On second thought, I'll save that for another time.
This whole coaching thing. What the fuck? Is this shit really that hard? Don't answer that. Coaching is important. So is having a trainer. The kind that tells you what to do to get fit, not the kind that you use to ride your bike indoors. (That's for my ESL readers). For some people. My issue here is athletes who think they're one in the same. Or maybe they can only afford one person. But I'll bet most of you don't even think about it. If you were able to follow this paragraph without getting lost, you can have a donut. Or a Nu2go bar, or a MuscleBrownie or something.
If you're a beginner type, then it probably doesn't matter. For one, you don't need a trainer. Any training you do will be good training, because you're a fucking beginner. So you probably need a "coach," because since you're a fucking beginner, you probably don't have a clue about how to go about racing. Coaches are supposed to be knowledgeable about competing, and be able to impart wisdom on their impressionable subjects. Think of all the stick and ball sports. That's how it works right? You want somebody with real experience, someone who understands the game. But you wouldn't take training advice from a fat fuck like Bill Parcells, would you?
Before I go any further, a quick comment on "motivator" coaches. This may seem like the pot calling the kettle black, but if you hired a coach because you "need someone to be accountable to" or you "need a kick in the ass," then just give the fuck up right now and go away. Please. Why in the fucking world someone wants to be good at something they don't even like to do enough to get out the fucking door and do it on their own will forever be a mystery to me. Rant off. Onward.
Even the best riders (and other athletes) have a trainer, or prepatore as they call them on the continent. And it's really not just someone to smuggle your horse medicines over the border in false-bottomed saddlebags strapped to a Vespa. Now that training has gone all Daria with the science words and shit, putting a professional on retainer might be a good idea for some people. Might. If that's what you need. But there are lots of athletes, bike racers anyway, who know how to train, who have the fitness, who just don't have any fucking idea of what to do with it. They need a coach, a director, not an over-read and underfed geek selling workout schedules.
Click to embiggen.
Yeah, I know, some "coaches" are qualified to do both jobs. Well enough anyway. Be honest though, have you ever thought about it? Like we say on Negacoach, if you wanted to think, you wouldn't be hiring a coach at all would you? It's so nice to clink cocoa mugs with all my favorite people, sharing some good times and warmth. Here's to four more years. I'm going to try to make it through the next four posts. That's challenging enough. Thanks for reading.
Here's your punishment for rolling your eyes at my crappy post.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Recently Purchased
The Motels, Robin Lane and the Chartbusters, Letters to Cleo, 10000 Maniacs. It's an 80's and 90's revival. Then on my way home from Brucie's super-bowel party I heard the Del Fuegos. I need to grab some of them and the Atlantics. And I finally broke down and bought a TV. Actually a new monitor with a built-in digital tuner. Don't worry, it's not like I'm getting cable. No new bikes though. Well, not directly anyway. I just dropped $2700 on dental work, and we're not even halfway there yet. But my new dentist is a rider, Velonews in the waiting room! I didn't even know it was a magazine and not a newspaper anymore. Anyway, he has me in the chair and he's telling me about his new Superfly 29'er singlespeed. I can't talk back, but of course I'm thinking that without the wealth transfer taking place at that instant, the thing could have been mine. Just shut up and smile. I know this is weak, but it's been a week. Thanks for all the comments on the last post, and thanks for reading.
Update - I almost forgot this addition. Should be Gewilli's theme song. Except for the low lead. "Gimme three gallons of biodiesel" just doesn't have the same rhyme to it.
Update - I almost forgot this addition. Should be Gewilli's theme song. Except for the low lead. "Gimme three gallons of biodiesel" just doesn't have the same rhyme to it.
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Shoes, Food, Fat, Clothing and maybe other stuff
Out of obligation to my dedicated readers, I present today's hurried post. More like a list of ideas that I'd craft into a thoughtful essay if I still gave a shit. Hey guess what, it's Ground Hog Day. There was even a hint of the dawn's early light at 0600 this morning. Normally that would be an exciting prelude to springtime morning workouts, but with the adjustment of DST pushing the clock forward an hour in just a month or so, why bother? Beyond that, my wake time schedule has migrated several hours later this past year. And you don't care anyway, right?
Blogs: the big topics so far in 2010 have been losing weight and losing shoes. Here are my quick thoughts on those subjects. Barefoot running? I understand the idea. Back to our caveman roots. Fits in great with the Paleo diet. At least there are some voices of reason on the subject, but how many people with today's bite-sized attention span will take the time to digest that before running (ha!) off to CitySports to buy a pair of Vibrams? Funny thing is, I was on the Five-Fingers bandwagon months ago, looking to buy a pair back when nobody had them. But I was only looking for a fashion statement, and something better than cleats to slip on for the walk to the registration table and back to the car (I hate sandals). But yeah, after 45+ years of wearing shoes whenever I venture outside, now I'm going to go with next to nothing when running, perhaps the most strenuous activity that I put my feet through? Something tells me this is an area where a LOT of caution is warranted. Yes, I have weak feet, and all the shoe-born symptoms the barefoot thing is supposed to correct. And most runners have "terrible" form, me included. Or so we're told. But come on. You've made it this far (I'm assuming decades) with shoes, so why not play it safe and give this new fad a few years of free trial on somebody elses feet before risking yours? I read one guy's account of how he ran out and bought Vibrams, went running, and after "only two miles" his calves hurt. Seriously. Guy had probably not walked barefoot any further than to the bathroom since Nixon was president, and now he's trying "only" two miles running on his first try? Are people really that stupid? Did I really just ask that...
Don't get me wrong. I'm all for more barefoot activity. I'm wearing just socks right now. The yoga people and their little slippers were way ahead of us here. My feet are f'd, and weak. And I think I wear my shoes too tight. I like the support. Maybe these facts are related. I can assure you my first barefoot run, if it ever happens, will be much shorter than two miles. Remember streaking? The only thing people wore WAS shoes. Seems as if we're going caveperson, hunting and gathering in shoeless splendor, we might as well go all the way and give up the Craft base layers and Pearl Izumi jackets too. Gewilli clearly leads here, commuting in a loin cloth to toughen himself up for resistance against the harsh elements. All the barefoot runners can take this lesson home. How about some blog pics of just you and your Frees? Bearded (or un-coiffed in 70's Penthouse style) and sans-glasses of course. Maybe a drawing scratched on a stone tablet would be safer and more appropriate...
Weight loss: a couple of neighborhood blogs going on about this one. I'm late, so quickly, why all these words about how you're going to lose the weight, but none back in the fall about how you gained it? I got a complaint about the lack of Nega-Coaching here lately, so I'll be blunt for a change: athletic bulimia does not work. I know; I've tried it. For a long time I was a purge then splurge guy. I never got lean. So many masters (and pre-masters) think they can eat all kinds of shit and it's OK because they're friggin' bike racers (or runners, or whatever). Look, if you eat exactly like the American general public, all training a zillion hours is going to do for is prevent you from being exactly like the general public, which is like 60 pounds overweight, in general. You won't get where you want to be. Here is the solobreak diet challenge. I just made this up in the last thirty seconds, so you know it's an ironclad, well-thought-out plan. Since it's already February 2, you get a free day. The idea here is to prove you can be consistent. Fifteen minutes a day on the trainer. Every day this month. I know you think that 15 minutes is a joke. Guess what? Over the course of the month that is seven hours, the equivalent of at least 1.5 of your weekend "epics," but without the 3000 calorie feast that usually comes afterward. But there's another component: no restaurants. This is difficult, and since "restaurant" is a generalization, I'll allow for some exceptions. If both the kitchen and the street are visible from the seating, the place is not a chain, the menu is unique, and the waitresses (ok, waitstaff, that's for my three female and one closet gay man readers) are cute, you are allowed two or three trips total for the month, so long as your meal is something that you could have made yourself. But it's still better not to go at all. You know restaurants are evil, why else would they make you wear shoes? We're out of time. Try it and report back. Thanks for reading, you fat fucks.
Blogs: the big topics so far in 2010 have been losing weight and losing shoes. Here are my quick thoughts on those subjects. Barefoot running? I understand the idea. Back to our caveman roots. Fits in great with the Paleo diet. At least there are some voices of reason on the subject, but how many people with today's bite-sized attention span will take the time to digest that before running (ha!) off to CitySports to buy a pair of Vibrams? Funny thing is, I was on the Five-Fingers bandwagon months ago, looking to buy a pair back when nobody had them. But I was only looking for a fashion statement, and something better than cleats to slip on for the walk to the registration table and back to the car (I hate sandals). But yeah, after 45+ years of wearing shoes whenever I venture outside, now I'm going to go with next to nothing when running, perhaps the most strenuous activity that I put my feet through? Something tells me this is an area where a LOT of caution is warranted. Yes, I have weak feet, and all the shoe-born symptoms the barefoot thing is supposed to correct. And most runners have "terrible" form, me included. Or so we're told. But come on. You've made it this far (I'm assuming decades) with shoes, so why not play it safe and give this new fad a few years of free trial on somebody elses feet before risking yours? I read one guy's account of how he ran out and bought Vibrams, went running, and after "only two miles" his calves hurt. Seriously. Guy had probably not walked barefoot any further than to the bathroom since Nixon was president, and now he's trying "only" two miles running on his first try? Are people really that stupid? Did I really just ask that...
Don't get me wrong. I'm all for more barefoot activity. I'm wearing just socks right now. The yoga people and their little slippers were way ahead of us here. My feet are f'd, and weak. And I think I wear my shoes too tight. I like the support. Maybe these facts are related. I can assure you my first barefoot run, if it ever happens, will be much shorter than two miles. Remember streaking? The only thing people wore WAS shoes. Seems as if we're going caveperson, hunting and gathering in shoeless splendor, we might as well go all the way and give up the Craft base layers and Pearl Izumi jackets too. Gewilli clearly leads here, commuting in a loin cloth to toughen himself up for resistance against the harsh elements. All the barefoot runners can take this lesson home. How about some blog pics of just you and your Frees? Bearded (or un-coiffed in 70's Penthouse style) and sans-glasses of course. Maybe a drawing scratched on a stone tablet would be safer and more appropriate...
Weight loss: a couple of neighborhood blogs going on about this one. I'm late, so quickly, why all these words about how you're going to lose the weight, but none back in the fall about how you gained it? I got a complaint about the lack of Nega-Coaching here lately, so I'll be blunt for a change: athletic bulimia does not work. I know; I've tried it. For a long time I was a purge then splurge guy. I never got lean. So many masters (and pre-masters) think they can eat all kinds of shit and it's OK because they're friggin' bike racers (or runners, or whatever). Look, if you eat exactly like the American general public, all training a zillion hours is going to do for is prevent you from being exactly like the general public, which is like 60 pounds overweight, in general. You won't get where you want to be. Here is the solobreak diet challenge. I just made this up in the last thirty seconds, so you know it's an ironclad, well-thought-out plan. Since it's already February 2, you get a free day. The idea here is to prove you can be consistent. Fifteen minutes a day on the trainer. Every day this month. I know you think that 15 minutes is a joke. Guess what? Over the course of the month that is seven hours, the equivalent of at least 1.5 of your weekend "epics," but without the 3000 calorie feast that usually comes afterward. But there's another component: no restaurants. This is difficult, and since "restaurant" is a generalization, I'll allow for some exceptions. If both the kitchen and the street are visible from the seating, the place is not a chain, the menu is unique, and the waitresses (ok, waitstaff, that's for my three female and one closet gay man readers) are cute, you are allowed two or three trips total for the month, so long as your meal is something that you could have made yourself. But it's still better not to go at all. You know restaurants are evil, why else would they make you wear shoes? We're out of time. Try it and report back. Thanks for reading, you fat fucks.
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